When my girlfriend told me that she was pregnant, everything changed...
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My name,
My address,
My Mobile number.
My facebook Id
Everything!

Aajkal Motorcycle Company es prakar ki bike bna rahi hai
Jis par piche baithi ladki
Girlfriend ki jagah esi lagti hai
Jese Vikram ke upper Betaal latka ho....

If Gurgaon becomes Gurugram then,
Kolkata: Kilogram
Mumbai: Milligram
Chennai: Centigram
Telangana: Telegram
And soon India will be Instagram!

Jokes of the day

Samay 1 sa nahin rahata
yaaro,
Sabka Badalata hai…
Jo kapade Angrejon ke Governor
Pahanakar logon ko Daraate the
Aaj hamaare Band Party vaale pahanate hai.

Happu Singh- tum ladkiya 1 se jyaada boyfriend kyon banaati ho?
Girl- taaki kisi ek par yah mahangai ki maar na pade yaar.

Pappu Doctor se kaya aap bina dard kiye bhi daant nikaal lete ho?
Doctor- Nahi to!
Pappu-Mai Nikaal leta hu
Doctor-kese?
Papu- hee hee hee hee hee haa haa haa

Boy: I am a super hero, guess my name?
Girl: Superman, Ironman?
Boy: No, Watchman, who saves owners lives!

Teacher- Agar sachche dil se prarthnaa kee jaae to vo jaroor safal hote hai.
Pappu rahane do Sir, agar aisaa hota to aap mere Sir naheen Sasur hote.

Santa-Lo mithae kho lo
Banta-Wahh! kis khusi me yaar?
Santa-Yaar teri bhabhi jo call centre me kaam karti hai use Best call Girl ka Award mila hai

Santa-Oye!what R U doing?
Banta-Recording this babys voice.
Santa-Why?
Banta- When he grows up, I shall ask him what he meant by this..

Santa Ne Jalte Hue Makan Se 6 Logo Ko Apni Jaan Pe Khelkar Bahar Nikala
Fir Bhi Usko Jail Ho Gayi

Kyun...


Kyun..Ki Vo Sab Firebrigade Wale The..

Gang of SARDARS broke a Bank.
Instead of cash they found Botles full of Chilled Red Wine,
Happily they drank & went away.


Next day Headline aai: Blood Bank lutya gya.

A teacher asked her class for sentences using the word "beans"..
"My father grows beans," said one student.

"My father cooks beans," said another.


Then a Little Santa spoke up: "We are all human beans."

Sardarji: Me E-Mail bnana hu. Sardar, Sardarg, Sardar123, Sardarabc Koi bhi nhe mil rha.


Sardarji Friend : Tum "Akalmand_Sardar" try kro 100% mil jye ga.

Santa was riding on a horse,
He jumped the red light & a cop whistles'
Santa lifts the tail of horse & says,

"Le Karle Number Note"..

Martin Luther ne kaha tha…
-
“agar tum ud nahin sakate to, daudo !
agar tum daud nahin sakate to, chalo !
agar tum chal nahin sakate to, rengo !
par aage badhate raho !”
-
ek Bihaari (khainee thokate hue):
oo.. sab ta theek ba.. loothar bhaijee…
lekin....marade...ee bataaba ki...jae ke kahaan baa......new fresh jokes of the day

Marwari ko phaansi ki saja sunai gayi....
jaj ne poochha- koi aakhiri khvaahish?
Marwari– mhaari jagah the latak jao!! jokes of the day

1 baar ek panjaabi U.P. gaya,
aur vahaan ek kue mein gir gaya…
ek aadami vahaan se gujara aur usane
panjaabi ke chillaane ki aavaaj suni...
U.P. vaala :- “abe kaun hai be kue ke bheetar?”
panjaabee :- “o paajee ! assi haan”
U.P. vaala :- abe do-chaar hote to nikaal bhi dete...
ab assi ko kaun nikaale...
pade raho bheetar hi...

SardarJi: Ghar mai Mera he Hukam chalta hai.
Mai Kehta hon, Garam paani le aao, woh le aati hai,

Dost: Garam pani Q?


Sardar: Garam pani se Bartan Achay Dhultay hain.

Santa k 12 bachon mein 1 alag dikhta tha:
Jab uski biwi marnay wali thi to Santa ne poocha: Ab to bata do ye kis ka hai?
Santa : sirf yehi apka bacha hai.

A lady asked Santa: LIPTON di chah hai?
Santa replied: Mainu ta nahi hai ji, tainu hai ta lipat ja...!

A MAN TO SANTA-- UR FRND IS KISSING UR WIFE IN UR HOME,
HE RUSHES TO HIS HOME
AND COME WITH IN HALF AN HOUR N
SLAPPED TAT MAN N SAID--
HE WAS NOT MY FRND..

Santa ki ladai apne baap se ho gayi
To usne apne baap ki photo kabristan me 1 ped pe latka diya
Aur Niche Likha
"COMING SOON

Santa:- Yar iska matlab kya hota hai, "I AM GOING"?
FRIEND:- Main jaa raha hun.
Santa :- Saaley, aise kaise jayega, 101 aur bhi aise ja chuke hain....answer bata ke jaa..

Santa went to temple & saw people puting coin in box & praying

Santa: Wow! How amazing. People are talking to God through coin phone without receiver

Santa: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with 'T'.
Santa : Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol..

Santa: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Santa : Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is 'All India Radio! '

In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Santa : Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. .....
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Santa : Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup...

Boss: Where were you born?
Santa : India ..
Boss: which part?
Santa : What 'which part'? Whole body was born in India .

To all bachelor's who are getting married, please remember, in marriage you can do anything... but not everything

Thought of the day:
If you can't convince her then...
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just confuse her!

My wife is my personal trainer, she decides my daily workout....
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Today it was laundry and the dishes!

They said, When Potassium Hydroxide (KOH) is added with Lithium (Li) it becomes Explosive Reagent.
Well said... "KOH+Li=KOHLI!

Gayle: Semifinal jitne ka kya tarika hai?
Sami: Hum India ka koi wicket nahi girayenge, na hi kohli aayega aur na hi wo Winning Shot wala Dhoni..

Beautiful Lines:
__________________
__________________
__________________
__________________
Next time, I'll send you beautiful circles!

Ye Sun kar mere hathon se Gol-Gappa hi gir gya.....very very funny sms jokes
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JaB Gol-Gappy wala bola"Plz give your feedback and comments on my Facebook Page - www.facebook.com/papu.golgappe"

Sarkar, Mantri, Santri, Neta, Police, vipaksh sbhi Kanhaiya me etne vyast hai ki
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pakistan ko khud batana pad raha hai bhai aatanki bheje hai,
fursat mile to dekh lena

Kohli 20/20 ese khel rahe hai jese enka break up Australia walo ne hi karwaya hai
Anuska tera ye balidaan yaad rakega hinustan

Anushka: Mujhe Kohli Se Milna Hai.
Dhoni: Main Tere Pair Padta Hun Final Tak Ruk Jaa!

hai koi wakil is duniyan me jo hara hua isq jita de

Calendar to 2017 ka bhi chhepaga Mallya ka
lekin es bar Hot Models ke jagah bankers nange honge

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